Deep Breaths

Emma (she/her)

In the world of overconsumption, overthinking, overproducing– ​anxiety is built into the grind. Anxiety is excessiveness needed to properly produce and consume. The ever-persistent thoughts, tension, and– 
I get overwhelmed by it all 

The wind blew 
The rain fell
My feet picked up and dropped down again and again
The birds sang  
The trees whispered 
I missed this

I put my headphones on 

I felt the wind
I saw the rain
But my feet fell silent now 
The birds and the trees had hid 

Incompleteness set in 
All the noise was drawn out 
except my head. 

Music, the gateway into my own world
to connect with nothing and everything at once
And the solace it once gave me 
I’m not sure where it went or when it did 

My headphones became my shield
but my shield blocked out too much of the present 

Music can become excessive too 
And with my senses drained
And brain overactive 

I couldn’t enjoy what was in front of me

I took my headphones off and took a deep breath 

The wind blew
The rain fell
My feet picked up and dropped down again and again 
The birds sang  
The trees whispered 
I missed this

My head started to run but I persisted 

I took another inhale 
Closed my eyes 
I’m in control 
I can let it go
All on my own–
At least today. 


I’ve learned many times over that my aid to drown out the noise, aka my headphones, when over used it becomes part of the problem. No longer aiding me when my brain overwhelms me rather making it more difficult for me to take in what’s going on in the present on my own.