the dishes

Franklin Lassen

i think about my gender 
when i'm washing the dishes
my favorite chore when i was a kid
​the only one i ever did 

well that's not 
quite true i'd
volunteer to rake 
as long as i could
jump into the leaves on my knees 
strumming on my rake guitar
listening to them laugh from the open window
too old to play pretend

not valued enough to do chores
non labor
intensive chores okay
maybe hence 
the dishes i would
offer 
to do them just so 
mom wouldn't have to plus
i liked it
and i never
questioned 
why that was
i just enjoyed 
whatever little labor 
i could

the first time i tried
to mow the lawn--
to prove i could
because my brother was gone-- 
i nearly passed out
face red as i sat on the couch 
recovering 
in my defense:
our lawn is very big and 
the mower was trash one wheel
had lost its tract
and was hell 
to push uphill 
still
i volunteered for the job and 
watched myself get strong but
i resented it
beneath the calm 
i thrashed 
against my position 
this was not a chore
just another thing i had to do 
another thing i had to do and 
worse one whose 
point i could never find whose
reasoning i was morally 
opposed to not like 
the dishes 
a concrete and 
necessary chore someone 
will always have to do
the dishes and watch 
as they become clean 
one at a time the mess
down the drain how 
beautifully simple 
and fun 
doing the dishes can be 

​